I welcome people in all bodies, of all genders, all sexual orientations, adopting all relationship styles. I don’t say this to be inclusive. It might seems obvious why a trans person would want to engage my services, but what about a cis person? Trans people are experts in living in the grey areas of life; in the in between and the unknown. If you are looking for change, or already experiencing it, then you are also in the in between, and this can be a scary place. It can also be an exciting place!

Where I experience myself at this stage of life, as a trans person, is just one facet of my experience and I’ve been something of a figurative chameleon for as long as I can remember. At some points this ability helped me blend to please and belong, as per a popular view of the chameleon, but it also represents my willingness to hear others’ perspectives and view life though others’ lenses. Sometimes that has led me to be overly impressionable and people pleasing, but it’s also allowed me to move through and intimately engage with many people and many perspectives. It allows me to ask the question ‘what’s that like for you?’ and hear your answer with an open heart. It has kept me open to what arises, and with practice and patience and hard work, I have learned to sit with the answers that have been less comfortable or convenient to hear, and to embrace the opportunities such openness affords.

This is the path of transformational change. If transformation, of any kind (spiritual, emotional, psychic, sexual, relational, personal, communal) is part of why you find yourself reading these words, then we could be a good fit.

If you’re unsure, you can book a 20 min intro call for a meet and greet – like in dating I find a fast meet and greet can establish quickly if there’s the chemistry to work together, or not. A fast ‘no’ is a good ‘no’, right?

A selection of my roles, experience & training

Co-founder, and facilitator, of Interactive Erotic Education.

Creator and facilitator for ‘Safer Professional Touch: trauma informed practice for clinical, allied health, and complementary therapies’. 

Emotional Support role for Sexological Bodywork Module 2 (intensive residential training).

Founder of K9ease, providing Safe and Sound Protocol (therapeutic anxiety intervention) to dogs

Independent sex industry professional

Intentional Peer Support (IPS) Core Certification, completed May 2024

Facilitator at TAPS (Trans and Gender Diverse AOD Peer Support) at Thorne Harbour Health (ongoing)

Institute of Somatic Sexology (ISS)
– ‘Certificate in Embodied Counselling’, completed August 2023;

London School of Clinical Communication and Hypnosis (LSCCH)
– ‘EMDR & Psychological Trauma professional training’, 2022;

Volunteer therapist working with Afghan women with refugee status (2022- 2023). www.greateraction.org

Dr Dan Siegel (MD)
– ‘The Mindsight Approach to Well-Being: A Comprehensive Course in Interpersonal Neurobiology’, 2021

iLS / Dr Stephen Porges (MD)
– ‘Safe & Sound Protocol Practitioner Training’, 2021;

Liz Scarfe from Melbourne Processwork Centre
– ‘Trauma Informed Facilitation’, 2021;

ACU Bachelor of Nursing (1st year), discontinued course;
-Motivational Interviewing (MI), 2020;

Barbara Carrellas
– ‘Urban Tantra Professional Training’, 2019;

Knightlamp
– Trauma informed practice, 2019;

Max and Ellen Schupbach
– Deep Democracy aka ‘World Work’, 2018 in Bangkok – a fascinating and dynamic approach to resolving conflict, both internal and global, underpinned by the work of Arnold Mindell and Process Orientated Psychology;

Dr Betty Martin
– ‘Like a Pro’, The Wheel of Consent training Professionals, 2018;

Anne-O-Nomis
– The Art of FemDom, 2019;
– The Seven Realm Arts of the Dominatrix, 2018.

Kenneth Ray Stubbs
– The Path of the Sexual Shaman, Shamanic training, 2017 – present;

The Institute of Somatic Sexology
– Certificate in Somatic Sex Education, 2017;
– An Introduction to Embodied Counselling, 2016;
– Certificate in Sexological Bodywork, 2016.

Deej Juventin
– An Introduction to Embodied Counselling, 2016;

OzKinkFest
– training with world renowned professionals including Mistress Tokya, Mistress Electra Amore, and others, 2016-present.

Curious Creatures
– Kink, Communication and Sexuality workshops, 2014-present.

Australian Tree Climbing Champion, Women’s Division. 2012 & 2013.

Sex & Kink positive and knowledgeable

I embody this philosophy to my core. My work as a professional Dominatrix and FSSW has given me the exposure to a vast array of human sexual desire, and the chance to truly connect with folx whose interests did not directly align with my own, as well as accept as pretty commonplace the more ‘perverse’ sexual fantasies people have. I have become entrenched in a culture of acceptance and curiosity about all consensual sexy and / or kinky play, and it is fascinating and beautiful and such a privilege!

I came to sex work needing a change from the grind, looking for my voice, looking for a tool to teach me how to set boundaries. What I found was a world where I could make my own rules, that gave me time to do my own therapy and integrate what I was learning, I got to study, and to take on childcare roles I would never have had time for in most other jobs. Sex work for any reason is valid.

It wasn’t always easy for me

I have been interested in BDSM for as long as I can remember, devouring the fantasies related in Nancy Friday’s ‘Secret Garden’, when I discovered them at around age 11. But it often felt as if everyone else was having mind-blowing sex*, and there was something wrong with me. One significant aspect that led me to the sex industry was that I wanted to make this my life, with no where to hide, to find those things I so desired; comfort and self-acceptance, to find out what was possible in this life. It took a huge amount of courage and determination for me to keep returning to illuminate my desire, re-examine interests and ‘shameful’ secrets. And I’m still learning.

 

*when I use the word sex these days, I do not assume that this involves any genitals, and certainly don’t assume that there is any penetration involved, although of course there can be. I use sex to mean any activity that engages with the sexual or sensual self, be that fantasy, BDSM play, group, partnered, or solo play.

My Story

My ability to hold space and be useful to you, is underpinned by my ability to care of myself. By doing so I can bring genuine presence to the time we have together. I like to come to each session in ‘a beginner’s mind’, ready and open to what you bring, without the baggage of my lens.

How do I do this? Well, I need to work on myself. This is the ongoing work of self-reflection, therapy and practices that serve my health and mental well-being.

I came to therapy in 2013 with a 15 year long binge drinking habit; frequent, uncontrollable emotional outbursts, and a lot of tears, especially around speaking about sex.

There was also suppressed rage (I didn’t connect with it this then);

…there was anxiety (I didn’t identify that then);

…and repressed trauma (I didn’t remember it then).

What I knew was that I hadn’t stayed put (in a place, a job, a relationship) for more than 2 years since I’d left home. I’d made a commitment to myself to stay put this time, and I liked what I was building. Now, two years in, having exploded upon my boss over who knows what (then), I knew I had to stay still (while recognising the growing itch to take flight again).

I was fit to burst.

I just couldn’t go on living this way any more. So I began.

With Barbara Carrellas at the end of the 6 day Urban Tantra Professional Training in 2019.

With Deej and Uma of the ISS at the end of the 14-day intensive module of the Certificate in Sexological Bodywork in 2016.

Prior to taking a direction toward self-development and healing, I graduated with a Fine Art bachelors from the University of Oxford, taught in a London Secondary School, then went on to become an Arborist before migrating to Australia where I set up and ran my own business, became the Women’s Australian Tree Climbing Champion competed twice in the International Tree Climbing Competitions. I made art from trees and for some years, and led a team to attempt to print one of the largest stump from a felled tree ever found in Australia; sadly this project didn’t come to fruition but it was heaps of fun along the way!

These days when I’m not working or playing, I am dedicating most my attention, in collaboration with another adult, to my blended family that comprises of three children and two cats.